Today was quite an eventful day. I successfully, ok not completely, but 80% managed to divert my thoughts about boyboy and frm 12pm-930pm was in my own little world, with good tuition kids, and their loved ones, talking and mingling away, and met my dear mavis for dinner and had a short chat. It felt really gd, every outing with her feels like it was the first…..
Den, towards 9pm HE msged, that’s when I started thinking about how he was.. and he called to ask where I was and all, nice of him :) he was telling me how I had told him tuition ends at 8pm, and was wondering if he could fetch me back, but since I was out and he already took the expressway towards home, he said “well another time then..its ok.”… how nice of him rite. i mean its the thought that counts.
and yeah, was telling Mavis about him today. She was like asking me “how???”. I said, “huh what how? Theres nothing to how about. We are just gd close friends…” and she said hmm. Well all that I want from him is his genuine care and concern and his ever flowing bubbliness. And yeah, I told him promptly I was heading back home and he said ok I just took my bath am going to eat now. Nice. Den as I was heading back, I asked him if he had eaten, he said yes baby. So unlike him to use that word, but he did. So den, I gave him a call, it was 11.10pm, called once, no answer. Called another two times after 10mins, stil he never picked up. Sent him a msg. And I decided he was reallyyy sound aslp. Poor boy, slept so early, He must have had a long and tiring day..
And you know that gdfornothing friend I had. He disappeared like 18th Feb I think, or was it earlier, to seremban with his friends. That week I was unwell, and yet I was smsing him asking how he was, NO REPLY. Till thurs he said he just got back after going to Msia with his friends..apparently last min planned. I said I was really angry with him and I was wondering how come no news from him and all….den thurs fri sat sun. He decided to msg me on sun asking me if I was stil angry..and he said sorry. I said, well ive been pretty lonely and unwell, but u took so long to reply me, might as well not reply right….and well, I saw him online, like 2-3 days back. He said hey. I said, yeah u wont reply right? He said, so sorry, I just saw my phone, it was in my pocket. I said,” where was the boy I knew before who wld reply so quickly and also msg to check on me and see how I was..?? I have nothing to say.”.. den he went offline, I thought he got dc.
Den today, 11plus I logged on. Was online for a min, scrolled thru my online friends list, and I saw him happily online. And the next min, he went offline. Hmmm. Fishy. Whats that supposed to mean. 1. he didn’t wanna talk to me? 2. he just happened to go offline when I logged in 3. Does he hate me for something I didn’t particularly do?. Goodness me, I have no clue. We were friends since Dec. and After 2.5 months, what has happened. The bond we shared has fragmented, I cant see any head or tail joined together now. Everything looks disfigured and faded. I have no idea seriously, I just hope time will tell me Im thinking too much. So honestly, I swear, the only guy friend I have now, in talking and smsing mode, is this BOY. Is that sad? I dunno what has happened, why I lose ppl like that, but sometimes I don’t care especially when ive done nothing wrong. If u choose to live your life as such, I have much better things to do too. The next thing I wonder is will I ever get to watch He is just not that into you, with any proper male species in the days to come? Why a male, is cos my Gfs have watched it already. They are fast, unlike me. Sheesh.
Every day passes by, it seems quite blank to me. No real motivation except books, papers and my pending assignments. Tomorrow I thought of hanging out with my permanent Bf, my Mummy. I love her no matter how much we fight, and we have nice cosy moments together… Unlike me and my dad, bicker and bicker only. Cos HE starts first ok. Anyway, I feel like some O level kid having NO Life and resorting to small, simple, lonely pleasures in life. Suddenly, the fact about going for a movie with some nice boy is overwhelming me. I don’t think ill ever get that chance, but im not going to bother if it doesn’t happen. Am I the revathy who is turning 23 in 6mths time? What has happened to my life? When ppl get older, its supposed to get more fulfilling, satisfying, and of course happening. Mine is going downhill. Im getting more bored, feeling that life is more routine, staying online more rather than headed out of home, I Go out ONLY for tuition, and I come back straight and sleep long hours. AM I going mad? I have been so homebound this holidays, and of course falling ill because I sleep a lot??? Argh. Theres a nice pleasant song playing in my headphones… Mudhal Murai Unnai partha Pothu…Yummy.
Gd nite.
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Monday, February 23, 2009
what a day. started with me losing my voice.
Day 3. I lost my voice early in the day. But, after 2 hours, I fully recovered, cos no choice I had to go give tuition. 2 kids were relying on me…….BIG TIME. The first person I told about this shocking news is that boy…..
And, while I was trying my best to stay strong, and put up a strong front to my kids, I could feel myself crumbling little by little as the night crept in. Sigh. I was wondering how am I going to endure the long ride back… And the bus wasn’t anywhere in sight. And my dear boy called, surprised to hear his energetic voice. Asked me where I was, and said “ill come fetch u back home”. I was like Omg, really. And kept thinking whether I shld take up the offer. After 1 min, I said yes…And he said “just give me 10min revathy, ill be right there, let me put on my shirt first….” And he hung up. I was pretty happy he was coming all the way to bukit merah to fetch me back, cos I felt like I really needed the attention, from someone I guess…
And he came, reversing the car into the bus stop. I stepped in, there was a loud English music blaring, and he switched on his blue side headlights, omg, my eyes were gone. He started driving,FAST, as usual. But first thing he did was “ill show u where SGH mortuary is…..” I said omg, are u kidding me, He said “y are u so scared??”.. and he drove in, along the way some guy turned into his lane abruptly, and there was huge horning by both sides…oh god.
Yeah after that mini adventure, we were back on track, heading on the expressway…he started playing SpB Indian classics, cos I said I wasn’t a fan of English songs… then he was veering in from lane to lane, I was literally holding onto my seat. He saw this and said, Ure scared right… I said, OF course, ure riding very fast… He said, “But I know my limits, trust me. If I cant cruise from one lane to another, I wont do it..Ive been driving for so many years..i know the limits da.. “ I said “No matter how many years u have been doing this, when our time is not right, one day things can go wrong..i Just want u to understand that..” and he said “ok.. I shall go slow now, since you’re beside me, I better be careful..you’re just like my mum and sister lah…”…I was laughing. And den after a while I said “Hey, can u lower the aircon…” , he had this glum face and urned it all the way to zero..i said “thanks!”, he said, “U feel better??” I said, “yeah, the whole thing is zero now, feels good”, he said “but I cant take it!” and he opened his side window letting the air blast in…..And just when that was over, I told him “can u make the volume lower….”, he said “hmmm take this remote and do whatever u want with it.”, I said “great!”, and reduced it to a fairly audible level…. He looked glum again. I said”why so serious…”, he said “No da, nothing at all..” and smiled.. And den he opened his car drawer and showed me the bottle and tissue pack he was keeping..after the emcee show. I was like omgodding the whole time… Den my stop was nearing, he stopped, and I told him I appreciated him fetching me, and all, he didn’t reply. He just kept silent. And den as I got out, he looked at me and smiled, I said Gdnite, and told him to cut down smoking, he smiled.. and just looked. And I left.
And then the msging started… After an emotional session, why it was emotional u may ask.cos he asked me if I liked him, I said I do like him as person, and I felt we can be really gd close friends..and asked him doesn’t he feel the same way… and he said he loved me and he felt sad that I cld only treat him as my friend, and said if that’s the case then now onwards I will only be his gd friend since that’s what I wanted.. I was quite affected, (don’t ask me why…) plus I wasn’t really feeling well… my head started to ache too…so I msged him saying “ do not take my words seriously today, cos I am not feeling well. I have been feeling quite lousy for the past 2 wks, sick and all and quite lonely. And I ve wanted someone to show care and attention towards me, and I don’t want to lose you with the words I say…”, he said “I will never leave u cos till now you are the only one I keep close to my heart, love treasure co sure my saying and angel…”. I guess that was enough to me. I told him “ I know I disappoint a lot of me when it comes to the matters of the heart, what to do…..i am sorry if I didn’t say what u wanted to hear…” and I also told him ”we are all born alone, and we die alone, but inbetween a few ppl will be very close to us, and I want one of them to be you…”, he said “don’t bother about me now, go and slp now, late already…I miss u”.. and I said “how can I not bother about u , my thoughts are always about u. pls take care, and u also go rest soon, and have your meals properly. Don’t care about who all says ure fat…”..He said “no matter what I still love u, and I will be here for u always. And pls go slp well, tuck yourself in the blanket…gd nite. Sweet dreams dear..”…….
This is how it ended. Miraculously, I feel better already. The power of love, is this what they call it. I cant see myself living with him, or accepting him as my husband, but I do like the attention care and love he is showering me. Its funny, how it all started, but there must be a reason why things are going this way….What has God in store for us??
And, while I was trying my best to stay strong, and put up a strong front to my kids, I could feel myself crumbling little by little as the night crept in. Sigh. I was wondering how am I going to endure the long ride back… And the bus wasn’t anywhere in sight. And my dear boy called, surprised to hear his energetic voice. Asked me where I was, and said “ill come fetch u back home”. I was like Omg, really. And kept thinking whether I shld take up the offer. After 1 min, I said yes…And he said “just give me 10min revathy, ill be right there, let me put on my shirt first….” And he hung up. I was pretty happy he was coming all the way to bukit merah to fetch me back, cos I felt like I really needed the attention, from someone I guess…
And he came, reversing the car into the bus stop. I stepped in, there was a loud English music blaring, and he switched on his blue side headlights, omg, my eyes were gone. He started driving,FAST, as usual. But first thing he did was “ill show u where SGH mortuary is…..” I said omg, are u kidding me, He said “y are u so scared??”.. and he drove in, along the way some guy turned into his lane abruptly, and there was huge horning by both sides…oh god.
Yeah after that mini adventure, we were back on track, heading on the expressway…he started playing SpB Indian classics, cos I said I wasn’t a fan of English songs… then he was veering in from lane to lane, I was literally holding onto my seat. He saw this and said, Ure scared right… I said, OF course, ure riding very fast… He said, “But I know my limits, trust me. If I cant cruise from one lane to another, I wont do it..Ive been driving for so many years..i know the limits da.. “ I said “No matter how many years u have been doing this, when our time is not right, one day things can go wrong..i Just want u to understand that..” and he said “ok.. I shall go slow now, since you’re beside me, I better be careful..you’re just like my mum and sister lah…”…I was laughing. And den after a while I said “Hey, can u lower the aircon…” , he had this glum face and urned it all the way to zero..i said “thanks!”, he said, “U feel better??” I said, “yeah, the whole thing is zero now, feels good”, he said “but I cant take it!” and he opened his side window letting the air blast in…..And just when that was over, I told him “can u make the volume lower….”, he said “hmmm take this remote and do whatever u want with it.”, I said “great!”, and reduced it to a fairly audible level…. He looked glum again. I said”why so serious…”, he said “No da, nothing at all..” and smiled.. And den he opened his car drawer and showed me the bottle and tissue pack he was keeping..after the emcee show. I was like omgodding the whole time… Den my stop was nearing, he stopped, and I told him I appreciated him fetching me, and all, he didn’t reply. He just kept silent. And den as I got out, he looked at me and smiled, I said Gdnite, and told him to cut down smoking, he smiled.. and just looked. And I left.
And then the msging started… After an emotional session, why it was emotional u may ask.cos he asked me if I liked him, I said I do like him as person, and I felt we can be really gd close friends..and asked him doesn’t he feel the same way… and he said he loved me and he felt sad that I cld only treat him as my friend, and said if that’s the case then now onwards I will only be his gd friend since that’s what I wanted.. I was quite affected, (don’t ask me why…) plus I wasn’t really feeling well… my head started to ache too…so I msged him saying “ do not take my words seriously today, cos I am not feeling well. I have been feeling quite lousy for the past 2 wks, sick and all and quite lonely. And I ve wanted someone to show care and attention towards me, and I don’t want to lose you with the words I say…”, he said “I will never leave u cos till now you are the only one I keep close to my heart, love treasure co sure my saying and angel…”. I guess that was enough to me. I told him “ I know I disappoint a lot of me when it comes to the matters of the heart, what to do…..i am sorry if I didn’t say what u wanted to hear…” and I also told him ”we are all born alone, and we die alone, but inbetween a few ppl will be very close to us, and I want one of them to be you…”, he said “don’t bother about me now, go and slp now, late already…I miss u”.. and I said “how can I not bother about u , my thoughts are always about u. pls take care, and u also go rest soon, and have your meals properly. Don’t care about who all says ure fat…”..He said “no matter what I still love u, and I will be here for u always. And pls go slp well, tuck yourself in the blanket…gd nite. Sweet dreams dear..”…….
This is how it ended. Miraculously, I feel better already. The power of love, is this what they call it. I cant see myself living with him, or accepting him as my husband, but I do like the attention care and love he is showering me. Its funny, how it all started, but there must be a reason why things are going this way….What has God in store for us??
Saturday, February 21, 2009
Whirlwind ride.....
It’s a funny world. I was talking to that boy again. And today was our first conversation on the phone, like a proper one. We spoke, and suddenly his phone died. I tried calling but no answer, it was mysteriously off. How could it be off? And after a good 15minutes I heard his voice once again on the phone, “HE was Alive!” I sighed a big relief, but hey guess what, he dropped his phone into the sink. And the first thing I said was, “I feel like I am a bad luck to you…..”, and he muttered, “if ure going to say something like this, next time don’t call me lahh.”… and I said, “no..thats not my intention. Nvm. Leave it.”
And he explained how it all started. Many months back, he saw me at a rehearsal, and he could recall me wearing a brown top, jeans and a black shoe and bag. And nx time he saw me was yet another rehearsal, some green top with jeans. And apparently all those times, this other senior male singer kept telling him that he was found a match for him. HE on the other hand shrugged it off. Things were going like this, and he met me once again at another show, a wedding at khalsa. I was dressed in a greenish silver saree. He said he didn’t like my blouse, ha ha, it was halter. But nvm that’s besides the point here. He totally admired me and liked me, den he went backstage and told that senior male that he liked me. That senior told him “Why are u waiting for, go and tell her then!”…. And he confided in another men, Sara, about how he felt, but Sara told him many things….
1. In terms of educational attainments…you guys are poles apart. Are u sure things can work out?
2. Family background wise…..
3. Personality wise…hmmmm
4. Height wise! Ha ha.
So our boy went home to think about it. But he still confessed he liked me a lot. The most appalling thing that I heard today was 1. he brought back the bottle I had drunk from , after our last emcee show, 2. he even brought home the tissue I had used to wipe. I was completely amazed, and kept asking what was that supposed to mean. He said it was for remembrance, when he doesn’t get to see me, he will see those items that I had once used.
Completely OMG. Is this a movie?? maybe thats deep liking....u know, u start to do crazy stuff...
Well a lot of things said, he has gone now to buy a new phone, I had to hang up cos mummy will be back. That’s the story so far. Its funny really. He told me he was really irritated with me at one point, when I told me there is a limit to disturbances you know. He felt like crap for that moment, cos no one had told him so, ever. He even told his dad, but after that he felt like it was a wakeup call, I had woken his senses and his thoughts up. He said that he had compared with so many other girls, but somehow it was very different working with me. Our personalities were different, and he claimed that I was very direct, this will deter any guy from proposing to me! Ha ha. Exactly the effect I had wanted…..:)
I told him I like ppl who are frank with me, and tell me what I asked them. I don’t like people who beat around the bush or play hide and seeks with me, cos I believe for a relationship to be healthy, any relationship for that matter, there must be adequate disclosure, at appropriate times definitely.. This will keep the bond strong and there will be trust fostered on both sides. And so our journey goes, this sat will be our big bday programme.
vv
And he explained how it all started. Many months back, he saw me at a rehearsal, and he could recall me wearing a brown top, jeans and a black shoe and bag. And nx time he saw me was yet another rehearsal, some green top with jeans. And apparently all those times, this other senior male singer kept telling him that he was found a match for him. HE on the other hand shrugged it off. Things were going like this, and he met me once again at another show, a wedding at khalsa. I was dressed in a greenish silver saree. He said he didn’t like my blouse, ha ha, it was halter. But nvm that’s besides the point here. He totally admired me and liked me, den he went backstage and told that senior male that he liked me. That senior told him “Why are u waiting for, go and tell her then!”…. And he confided in another men, Sara, about how he felt, but Sara told him many things….
1. In terms of educational attainments…you guys are poles apart. Are u sure things can work out?
2. Family background wise…..
3. Personality wise…hmmmm
4. Height wise! Ha ha.
So our boy went home to think about it. But he still confessed he liked me a lot. The most appalling thing that I heard today was 1. he brought back the bottle I had drunk from , after our last emcee show, 2. he even brought home the tissue I had used to wipe. I was completely amazed, and kept asking what was that supposed to mean. He said it was for remembrance, when he doesn’t get to see me, he will see those items that I had once used.
Completely OMG. Is this a movie?? maybe thats deep liking....u know, u start to do crazy stuff...
Well a lot of things said, he has gone now to buy a new phone, I had to hang up cos mummy will be back. That’s the story so far. Its funny really. He told me he was really irritated with me at one point, when I told me there is a limit to disturbances you know. He felt like crap for that moment, cos no one had told him so, ever. He even told his dad, but after that he felt like it was a wakeup call, I had woken his senses and his thoughts up. He said that he had compared with so many other girls, but somehow it was very different working with me. Our personalities were different, and he claimed that I was very direct, this will deter any guy from proposing to me! Ha ha. Exactly the effect I had wanted…..:)
I told him I like ppl who are frank with me, and tell me what I asked them. I don’t like people who beat around the bush or play hide and seeks with me, cos I believe for a relationship to be healthy, any relationship for that matter, there must be adequate disclosure, at appropriate times definitely.. This will keep the bond strong and there will be trust fostered on both sides. And so our journey goes, this sat will be our big bday programme.
vv
Friday, February 20, 2009
pretty much eventful.
I did a ridiculous questionaire last night, and to my horror I got something like “my marriage age is 23”. Are u like freaking kidding me? That’s like in 6mths! Am I supposed to go insane from this minute. Pls.
Anyway, I realised its nearing a year since I last blogged. Time is flying too crazily fast. Ok I keep saying this in every entry and time somehow seems to speed up. Ive been nicely sick the past 2 days, my efforts at getting very much better have been foiled, as I woke up today with a bad nose, and bad throat and a bad stomach. What a lethal combination. I didn’t go for singing class, and as a matter of fact, I felt an ounce of guiltiness when I read the last blog. Esp the bit about how ive been going for singing classes more frequently. Why is it that my nose is always getting blocked, out of the blue? Is it my dad’s genes or because he invisibly passes ME the disease? Or I am just more susceptible to it? I think it’s a combination of factors, I have no clue how long I am supposed to tolerate this.
So yeah, back to the interesting bit about my life. Okay, whats so interesting about it? I ve been doing more outside performances, deepavali, bdays, weddings, ponggal, and also did emceeing. Some politics of singing was at work, people showing some attitude, and taking away my songs, and doing some underground and (overground) activity. You might be wondering what in the world is that? Well, they just shove u pleasing comments and expect u to embrace them almost instantaneously. They say you’re their hero, their star, wadever, and hence they use this as a tool to become your bestest friends. Best friends in this industry is bad. I feel, there should be a clear demarcation of your “rank”, “authority” and duties, from your peers, acquaintaces.
And here comes the funny bit. A boy, erm why I say this, cos he is 23, from the first time he saw me sing, cos he is a singer too, said he likes me. He disclosed me this after spotting me at shows, in which he happened to sing too, after maybe a gd 2-3 mths. He made this revelation in Dec via sms, a few days b4 new year’s day. I didn’t know how to react cos it completely took me off guard. I was thinking, is the cycle starting once again? He openly told me he may never get to be with me, but wanted to be gd frens with me, I said yeah sure why not. And things hit off from there. Nothing much happened till in Mid January, he wanted to pick me up from school, as I was heading towards Little India. He works in a Casket Company, but that particular day he was really free. (It is highly rare for him to shaking leg by the way). So he came, we talked for like 10mins during the ride, and before u knew it, at a traffic junction, he banged the taxi infront of him, lightly. I didn’t even realize it and that must be the joke of the year. The scene was quite nerve wrecking, you know its not everyday u get to witness these things first hand and while you’re uninjured….his number plate came off, his front got scratched and all that but the taxi driver and the taxi suffered nothing. We headed off to grab a quick Burger, but cldnt talk much as he kept getting calls from the taxi driver, the car workshop people, his father, and all .. what an eventful day. I on the other hand felt guilty, that he shld not have picked me up or come over to beach road, and so on. That incident became etched in my memory till today, which is the almost the end of Feb.
Now, we are good friends. A week back, we did an emcee show together. Yes we did have a lot of good chemistry, working with one another. He was relaxed Joe, and I was the fast paced lady at work. Nice combi. He gave me a plastic rose, during a 5min break backstage, and I was quite amused by it. I was observing him here and there,and he was doing his best “bullying” me on stage and passing funny remarks. He kept asking me why I didn’t have a bf, I just didn’t know what to say. A few words forced their way out such as “cant find the one, didn’t have the time….”, which were largely true. The show ended, our Chemistry ended, and I got back, got some gd rest. But our texting continued, he revealed 2 days back that he really liked me, and he didn’t admire me the same way others did. Uh huh. I just said I appreciated that. And he said that was enough for him for now. Agreed.
I definitely don’t wish to or hope to take things to another level, but he can be a nice enough person to have a gd laughter with and feel comfortable with. Yesterday he was nice enough to text me, find out how my day was, and whether Ive taken my medi. Good signs for a gd, close friendship I must say. i am usually the most pessimistic when it comes to relationships, any form or kind. I keep a cool head, mostly, cos no point thinking too much about anything. As for him, i appreciate it and treasure him as my friend. If he has gd intentions and a clean heart, our bond is here to stay.....
My nose is dripping. I feel quite lousy. The whole night I was just lying in bed, awake, and my mind whirring through a thousand thoughts. This is precisely why I hate being sick. Ok I shall just go for an eye shutter before I leave my house at 1015am for tuition.
Anyway, I realised its nearing a year since I last blogged. Time is flying too crazily fast. Ok I keep saying this in every entry and time somehow seems to speed up. Ive been nicely sick the past 2 days, my efforts at getting very much better have been foiled, as I woke up today with a bad nose, and bad throat and a bad stomach. What a lethal combination. I didn’t go for singing class, and as a matter of fact, I felt an ounce of guiltiness when I read the last blog. Esp the bit about how ive been going for singing classes more frequently. Why is it that my nose is always getting blocked, out of the blue? Is it my dad’s genes or because he invisibly passes ME the disease? Or I am just more susceptible to it? I think it’s a combination of factors, I have no clue how long I am supposed to tolerate this.
So yeah, back to the interesting bit about my life. Okay, whats so interesting about it? I ve been doing more outside performances, deepavali, bdays, weddings, ponggal, and also did emceeing. Some politics of singing was at work, people showing some attitude, and taking away my songs, and doing some underground and (overground) activity. You might be wondering what in the world is that? Well, they just shove u pleasing comments and expect u to embrace them almost instantaneously. They say you’re their hero, their star, wadever, and hence they use this as a tool to become your bestest friends. Best friends in this industry is bad. I feel, there should be a clear demarcation of your “rank”, “authority” and duties, from your peers, acquaintaces.
And here comes the funny bit. A boy, erm why I say this, cos he is 23, from the first time he saw me sing, cos he is a singer too, said he likes me. He disclosed me this after spotting me at shows, in which he happened to sing too, after maybe a gd 2-3 mths. He made this revelation in Dec via sms, a few days b4 new year’s day. I didn’t know how to react cos it completely took me off guard. I was thinking, is the cycle starting once again? He openly told me he may never get to be with me, but wanted to be gd frens with me, I said yeah sure why not. And things hit off from there. Nothing much happened till in Mid January, he wanted to pick me up from school, as I was heading towards Little India. He works in a Casket Company, but that particular day he was really free. (It is highly rare for him to shaking leg by the way). So he came, we talked for like 10mins during the ride, and before u knew it, at a traffic junction, he banged the taxi infront of him, lightly. I didn’t even realize it and that must be the joke of the year. The scene was quite nerve wrecking, you know its not everyday u get to witness these things first hand and while you’re uninjured….his number plate came off, his front got scratched and all that but the taxi driver and the taxi suffered nothing. We headed off to grab a quick Burger, but cldnt talk much as he kept getting calls from the taxi driver, the car workshop people, his father, and all .. what an eventful day. I on the other hand felt guilty, that he shld not have picked me up or come over to beach road, and so on. That incident became etched in my memory till today, which is the almost the end of Feb.
Now, we are good friends. A week back, we did an emcee show together. Yes we did have a lot of good chemistry, working with one another. He was relaxed Joe, and I was the fast paced lady at work. Nice combi. He gave me a plastic rose, during a 5min break backstage, and I was quite amused by it. I was observing him here and there,and he was doing his best “bullying” me on stage and passing funny remarks. He kept asking me why I didn’t have a bf, I just didn’t know what to say. A few words forced their way out such as “cant find the one, didn’t have the time….”, which were largely true. The show ended, our Chemistry ended, and I got back, got some gd rest. But our texting continued, he revealed 2 days back that he really liked me, and he didn’t admire me the same way others did. Uh huh. I just said I appreciated that. And he said that was enough for him for now. Agreed.
I definitely don’t wish to or hope to take things to another level, but he can be a nice enough person to have a gd laughter with and feel comfortable with. Yesterday he was nice enough to text me, find out how my day was, and whether Ive taken my medi. Good signs for a gd, close friendship I must say. i am usually the most pessimistic when it comes to relationships, any form or kind. I keep a cool head, mostly, cos no point thinking too much about anything. As for him, i appreciate it and treasure him as my friend. If he has gd intentions and a clean heart, our bond is here to stay.....
My nose is dripping. I feel quite lousy. The whole night I was just lying in bed, awake, and my mind whirring through a thousand thoughts. This is precisely why I hate being sick. Ok I shall just go for an eye shutter before I leave my house at 1015am for tuition.
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