Day 3. I lost my voice early in the day. But, after 2 hours, I fully recovered, cos no choice I had to go give tuition. 2 kids were relying on me…….BIG TIME. The first person I told about this shocking news is that boy…..
And, while I was trying my best to stay strong, and put up a strong front to my kids, I could feel myself crumbling little by little as the night crept in. Sigh. I was wondering how am I going to endure the long ride back… And the bus wasn’t anywhere in sight. And my dear boy called, surprised to hear his energetic voice. Asked me where I was, and said “ill come fetch u back home”. I was like Omg, really. And kept thinking whether I shld take up the offer. After 1 min, I said yes…And he said “just give me 10min revathy, ill be right there, let me put on my shirt first….” And he hung up. I was pretty happy he was coming all the way to bukit merah to fetch me back, cos I felt like I really needed the attention, from someone I guess…
And he came, reversing the car into the bus stop. I stepped in, there was a loud English music blaring, and he switched on his blue side headlights, omg, my eyes were gone. He started driving,FAST, as usual. But first thing he did was “ill show u where SGH mortuary is…..” I said omg, are u kidding me, He said “y are u so scared??”.. and he drove in, along the way some guy turned into his lane abruptly, and there was huge horning by both sides…oh god.
Yeah after that mini adventure, we were back on track, heading on the expressway…he started playing SpB Indian classics, cos I said I wasn’t a fan of English songs… then he was veering in from lane to lane, I was literally holding onto my seat. He saw this and said, Ure scared right… I said, OF course, ure riding very fast… He said, “But I know my limits, trust me. If I cant cruise from one lane to another, I wont do it..Ive been driving for so many years..i know the limits da.. “ I said “No matter how many years u have been doing this, when our time is not right, one day things can go wrong..i Just want u to understand that..” and he said “ok.. I shall go slow now, since you’re beside me, I better be careful..you’re just like my mum and sister lah…”…I was laughing. And den after a while I said “Hey, can u lower the aircon…” , he had this glum face and urned it all the way to zero..i said “thanks!”, he said, “U feel better??” I said, “yeah, the whole thing is zero now, feels good”, he said “but I cant take it!” and he opened his side window letting the air blast in…..And just when that was over, I told him “can u make the volume lower….”, he said “hmmm take this remote and do whatever u want with it.”, I said “great!”, and reduced it to a fairly audible level…. He looked glum again. I said”why so serious…”, he said “No da, nothing at all..” and smiled.. And den he opened his car drawer and showed me the bottle and tissue pack he was keeping..after the emcee show. I was like omgodding the whole time… Den my stop was nearing, he stopped, and I told him I appreciated him fetching me, and all, he didn’t reply. He just kept silent. And den as I got out, he looked at me and smiled, I said Gdnite, and told him to cut down smoking, he smiled.. and just looked. And I left.
And then the msging started… After an emotional session, why it was emotional u may ask.cos he asked me if I liked him, I said I do like him as person, and I felt we can be really gd close friends..and asked him doesn’t he feel the same way… and he said he loved me and he felt sad that I cld only treat him as my friend, and said if that’s the case then now onwards I will only be his gd friend since that’s what I wanted.. I was quite affected, (don’t ask me why…) plus I wasn’t really feeling well… my head started to ache too…so I msged him saying “ do not take my words seriously today, cos I am not feeling well. I have been feeling quite lousy for the past 2 wks, sick and all and quite lonely. And I ve wanted someone to show care and attention towards me, and I don’t want to lose you with the words I say…”, he said “I will never leave u cos till now you are the only one I keep close to my heart, love treasure co sure my saying and angel…”. I guess that was enough to me. I told him “ I know I disappoint a lot of me when it comes to the matters of the heart, what to do…..i am sorry if I didn’t say what u wanted to hear…” and I also told him ”we are all born alone, and we die alone, but inbetween a few ppl will be very close to us, and I want one of them to be you…”, he said “don’t bother about me now, go and slp now, late already…I miss u”.. and I said “how can I not bother about u , my thoughts are always about u. pls take care, and u also go rest soon, and have your meals properly. Don’t care about who all says ure fat…”..He said “no matter what I still love u, and I will be here for u always. And pls go slp well, tuck yourself in the blanket…gd nite. Sweet dreams dear..”…….
This is how it ended. Miraculously, I feel better already. The power of love, is this what they call it. I cant see myself living with him, or accepting him as my husband, but I do like the attention care and love he is showering me. Its funny, how it all started, but there must be a reason why things are going this way….What has God in store for us??
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment